Why, its Greased Lightning!

It has been a long time since I have seen Grease, come to think of it I can only remember certain scenes and songs from the movie. I did really enjoy it even though a lot of it was kinda over the top. The opening credits reminded me of the old school house rock cartoons. I can also see why it is widely appreciated. And everything works out in the end (of course), other that if you don't mind musicals definitely check it out if you haven't and that's about all that I have to say about Grease.

I'm doing a really short post cause I have decided to go on "hiatus" for a little bit. The movies lately have just been kinda "blah" and with the weather getting good out so I need my weekends open. I could also be that I don't think that anyone ever reads this at all but that was never the main plan behind this (to have a bunch of readers/followers). But anyways I tend to come back, not sure how long it will be before another post but will try to start back up after summer. I'll be back!

Take that, fuckers!

This week I'm gonna attempt to talk about Pink Floyd The Wall. This was my first time actually seeing it but I have heard the album coinciding with the movie numerous times. The movie is about the life of the fictional rock star 'Pink' is the subject of the visually evocative cult film based upon the music and visions of the group Pink Floyd as portrayed in the album of the same title. Relationships, drug abuse, sex, childhood, WWII and fascism combine in a disturbing mix of episodic live action and lyrical animation drawn by British caricaturist Gerald Scarfe.(all from IMDb) I'm not sure if I was just tired and couldn't really understand what was going on or it is really that confusing. So after I got home I watched it again to try and better understand it. After reading the plot synopsis online it made a lot more sense. I not sure if I can say much at all to describe this movie any better, but it is defiantly worth checking out even if only for the music. To try and make up for the late post and lack of info about the movie here are a ton of trailers that were shown before the movie.















Alright enough trailers for this week, on to some interesting scenes from the feature presentation.





Interesting animation throughout the movie


People Grinder


The Result


More animation


Severe case of ADD?




Next Week: Grease

Two tons of metal, 200 miles an hour, flesh and bone and plain old Newton...

GRINDHOUSE Part 2

The first thing I wanna say about Death Proof is that I prefer this movie a lot more than Planet Terror, only because I could see this as more of a grindhouse movie. I know a lot if people complain that this film looks too good or that the film quality gets better (the grindhouse movie was supposed to be "bad" film quality) but who's to say that the movie hasn't been stored good or taken care of. Why does a grind house movie have to have bad picture quality? And one last note, the editing was bad but intentionally that bad. It fits better with the lower budget quickly but together movie from the grindhose era, unlike Planet Terror which was edited good and had a lot of special effects. Okay I'm done bitching, and the trailers were the same as last night so let's get to it.

The movie picked up where it left off last night, starting with Don't. This trailer was great, very Euro inspired with the movie title repeated a lot. It also has some other things that seem to come from that era/type of movie like a creepy old lady, the white eyes and some eye violence.



Next was Thanksgiving, a trailer very much inspired by the early eighties strait to video slasher movies. Although this one is completely over the top and doesn't seem to have much of a plot and all the good points would be given out during this trailer (if it was a actual film). Very good none the less, alright let's get to the feature.



I guess I will say this now, there is a ton of dialog in this movie that doesn't matter at all and it is only interesting when Kurt Russell is talking (cause he is really creepy). Alright so the movie starts out with three girlfriends getting together and going to get some food and planing for the weekend. As they are complaining about their guy problems and what not it seems like they are being followed.



After tons of dialog and hearing about a lap dance that someone might have to do, they all go to a bar and meet some friends. The car that seems to be following them happens to be at the bar as well and you meet the driver, Stuntman Mike (and his first victim, played by Rose McGowan).



After a lot more dialog and a poem recited by Mike (to get the lap dance) the girls decide to go to some cabin and Mike gives Rose a ride "home". While Stuntman Mike drives erratically beating Rose around he explains that the seat he is sitting in is the only one that's death proof, then he slams on the breaks smashing her face on the dash board killing her.



Mike then has to collect his other girls and takes off after them. He finds their car and passes them and flips around facing them. He guns it and drives at them head on and then you get one of the best car crashes in a movie ever. Oh yea and everyone died except for Stuntman Mike.





Mike ends up in the hospital with barely any injuries and the cops can't do anything to him cause all the girls were drunk and stoned. After that the movie cuts to Mike finding a new set of girls and the girls do a lot of talking over breakfast. During that conversation you hear that Zoe Bell has found and wants to drive a 70's Dodge Challenger identical to the one used in Vanishing Point. After they con the owner into letting them test drive it by them self, Zoe plays ships mast on the car (she climbs on the hood while going really fast).



That is when Mike makes his move and starts messing with the girls by chasing them and ramming into their car. After a while of that they both spin out, Zoe gets flung from the car and Mike gets shot by the girls.



Zoe ends up being fine and they take off after Mike to get revenge. The rest of the movie is the girls chasing Mike though traffic and dirt roads. They get Mike to wreck and then kick the shit out of him. The End



Next Week: Pink Floyd The Wall

I'm gonna eat your brains and gain your knowledge

GRINDHOUSE Part 1

This week I am gonna talk a little bit about Grindhouse. This is one of my favorite movies of the last couple of years, and is best viewed as the entire Grindhouse experience. Unfortunately I still have yet to see it that way (besides a bootleg at home) in a crowed theater. I don't have much more to say about the movie except that I got to see it over two nights. Anyways here are a couple of trailers before the opening trailer, I think that made sense...





The movie starts with a trailer for Machete, one of the best parts of the whole Grindhouse feature as a whole was the trailers. Machete is one if the most over the top kick ass action revenge "films" that was never made (at least yet). So here is the trailer in its entirety.



Now on to the first feature, Planet Terror. It starts out with a go-go dance by Cherry Darling (played by Rose McGowan) which I wouldn't mind if the credits actually ran a little longer.



It was her last night being a dancer, she repeatedly talks about being a comedian, starts walking home and gets run off the road by a military convoy. The convoy meets up with some shady dealer type characters and all sorts of bad stuff go down. People turning on each other, someone losing their balls and most importantly a deadly gas getting released, infecting people and stuff.



From here the movie goes into a bunch of side plots which don't really matter much, only one main one kinda touched on later. Cherry meets up with El Wray at a BBQ place and he gives her a ride home. On the way they get in an accident and Cherry ends up losing her leg, not from the crash but some zombies. El Wray takes her to the hospital and you see a lot more of infection spreading in the town. And he gets busted by the cops. Another plot point that you never figure out is why El Wray is in trouble and such a bad ass.



As some zombies attack the police station the surviving cops and El Wray make a break for it and go to pickup Cherry. There is some more pointless plot going on between the Dr. William Block and Dr. Dakota Block that makes fir some entertainment later, with Dakota hands rendered useless and the William gets infected.



The group that leaves the hospital all go to the BBQ place and hide out. Meanwhile the best part of the movie happens, where after Dakota picked up her son she gives him a gun to defend himself while she gets help and the boy shoots himself in the face.



After all that good stuff happens there is a scene where you figure out a little more about the relationship between El Wray and Cherry Doll. That turns in to a sex scene and just when it starts to get goo...



Okay what the fuck just happened? Zombies are attacking, more people showed up and the building is on fire. As they are escaping in a bunch of vehicles, even a mini bike, they are stopped and captured buy the military convoy. El Wray and the scientist escape and meet up with Bruce Willis and he unleashes the only plot point that really matters. The military convoy was infected with the gas because they killed Osama Bin Laden, and now they need it in small doses so they don't mutate and die. Then Bruce Willis mutates and they kill him.



They rescue the rest of the survivors and as they all are getting ready to escape El Wray gives Cherry a machine gun for a leg, yea I know what your thinking, freaking awesome. There is some impressive leg shooing going on as they make a break for the helicopters, and a couple of the main guys die as they escape. Then cut to about a year later and all the survivors are surviving in Mexico and Cherry has up graded the machine gun to a chain gun. Awesome!



I'm gonna end this post with the trailer of Werewolf Women of the SS. Now I love this trailer and I know a lot of people say that it was the worst of them all but I would have to disagree. I think it was over the top just as much as any of the others and you never see any new SS movies anymore. I thought it was a interesting take on them, my only bitch is that for the showing it cut early and I didn't even get to see Fu Manchu.

It's just a flesh wound

This week, Monty Python and the Holy Grail is a movie that is revered as probably one of the best comedies ever, and I have never seen it in its entirety. I can actually only remember certain parts from the movie (not even exact scenes), like the Black Knight being dismembered and the killer rabbit. Having said that, and after actually watching it, I am surprised that I have never sat down to watch it. It is going to work its way into my regular comedy movies that I watch. Enough babbling and whatnot on to the trailer and movie.



Alright so this movie starts out a little weird, with the "closing" credits, and they throw in a hand full of jokes with it. Then the movie actually opens with King Arthur traveling around (with his "servant" banging coconuts together to sound like a horse) to various castles to recruit knights for the Court of Camelot. Along his travel he comes across a Black Knight that he must defeat to pass the bridge.

None shall pass.

It's just a flesh wound.

After "agreeing on a draw" King Arthur recruits four knights to be part of the Knights of the Round Table. They all get a message from God to acquire the Holy Grail. At the beginning of their quest they come across a castle and it houses some French people who are very rude and wont let them in to get the grail. After their bad plans for sneaking in fail they get livestock thrown at them they retreat.

Run away!


They then split up to cover more ground and there are a bunch a short funny things that happen to each of the Knights of the Round. Sir Robin runs away from a three headed knight that wants to kill him. Sir Galahad comes across castle Anthrax, which is inhabited by nothing but women. He is ordered by the mistress to punish them and then he will receive oral sex, unfortunately he is then "rescued" by Sir Lancelot. King Arthur and Sir Bedevere come across the Knights who say Ni! and and must get a shrubbery to pass. Sir Lancelot gets a note, that he thinks is from a princess that is being held hostage, and goes to rescue "her". While storming the castle and killing a ton of people he finds out that the person that sent the note is a guy so he attempts to make a dramatic exit. Back to Arthur and Sir Bedevere, they return with the shrub and the knights changed their name and want another shrub. Arthur says the word that the knights can't stand and they escape. They then meet up with Lancelot and the rest of the knights of the round and rejoice!



Around this time a knight rides by some guy that appears to be filming something and is killed and throughout the movie are cops looking for the said knight.



They meet the enchanter who is just blowing shit up, and he tells them where to go but they must pass a devastating monster with huge teeth, a rabbit.



After the rabbit kills most of their troops they kill it with the holy grenade and enter the cave. The knights get chased by the Black Beast of Arrrghhh until the animator suffers a heart attack and dies. Shortly after they encounter an old man that is guarding a bridge and they must answer three questions to pass.




Sir Lancelot passes first and then gets busted buy the cops. After one of the others get thrown off of the cliff for not knowing an answer Arthur stumps the old man by knowing too much about "birds" and the old guy is thrown off the cliff.



Arthur and another knight make it to Castle Arrrghhh, which supposedly holds the holy grail, it is ran by the french and they refuse to let them in again. Arthur all fed up gets an army (out of nowhere) and they charge the castle. Before they get there the cops pull up bust Arthur and end the movie.



Next Week: Grindhouse
Friday: Planet Terror
Saturday: Death Proof

As you wish

The Princess Bride is a movie that I haven't seen in about ten years and the only thing that I remember about it is that it was hilarious (and boy was it). This "romantic" comedy is directed by Rob Reiner (one of the best movies he has done) was kinda slapsticky and is a great example of late 80's comedy. It starred a very young Cary Elwes (who is hilarious in this) and had a lot of smaller roles played b some big name actors, like Billy Crystal, Carol Kane, Fred Savage, Christopher Guest, Chris Sarandon, and even a interesting performance by Andre the Giant. Enough with all that hub-bub and here are a couple of trailers.





The movie starts out with Fred Savage's grandfather (played by Peter Falk) reading a story to him because he was sick.

Fencing, fighting, torture, revenge, giants, monsters, chases, escapes, true love, miracles...


The story starts with Wesley (Cary Elwes) and Buttercup (Robin Wright) falling in love with each other only to have Wesley leave to seek fortune, only after promising to come back for her. Buttercup hears that he never made is and was captured and killed by Dread Pirate Roberts. Five years later she is set to wed Prince Humperdinck, about a week before the wedding Buttercup is kidnapped by these three guys and is told she will be killed to start a war. As they make it to the cliffs of insanity they are followed by this man in black.



After the man in black catches up with them he has a sword fight with the Spaniard (after a short break). A short time later he gets some rocks thrown at his head, so he makes a deal with Andre the Giant to fight hand to hand. Defeating Andre the Giant with a sleeper hold he is then challenged to a battle of wits, in which he wins easily by being immune to the poison that they both drink.



While all of this is going on they are followed by Prince Humperdinck and his crew. It takes buttercup pushing the man in black down a huge hill to figure out who he actually is (her beloved Wesley).



As they are running from the Prince they go through some creepy ass woods and Wesley fights a ginormous rat.



After making it out of the woods Wesley is captured (sent to a torture chamber) and buttercup says that she will go back to the Prince. The prince convinces buttercup to marry him if Wesley doesn't come back for her (she thinks he returned to being Dread Pirate Roberts and would come back for her). As Wesley is being tortured Andre the Giant and the Spaniard hear him and go to rescue him.



When he is found he is almost dead and is taken to an old miracle man (played by Billy Crystal). After being revived from being "mostly dead" he can barely move and is dragged around by Andre the Giant. After invading the castle the Spaniard seeks his revenge on the six fingered man (he's the guy that killed the Spaniards father) and Wesley goes after Buttercup.

Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.


So pretty much thats the end of the movie, Spaniard got his revenge and Wesley rescued Buttercup (after out witting the Prince). All is good and the story ends with a kiss.

Since the invention of the kiss there have been five kisses that were rated the most passionate, the most pure. This one left them all behind.

The End.

Grandpa, maybe you could come over and read it again to me tomorrow.

As you wish.

Next Week: Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Terrific. Where the heck is 122 1/8?

Alright so I have been a little late with my regular weekly updates (even though I not sure if anyone actually reads them). I have been distracted the last couple of weeks (god damn Resident Evil 5) and I don't want this blog to die and thrown into the wasteland of all the other dead blogs strewn across the internet. So I'm gonna try to make a vow to myself to get the posts out sooner and I don't want to miss a week (unless it is something that has been shown recently).

Enough with my worrying about the releases of the posts, now to the content. Don't know if its worth saying but I'm not terribly happy with the layout and presentation of my posts so I am gonna try to change them. It has been a little hard for me to come up with "review" type things to say about a lot of the movies lately. Recently they have all been films that I love or hold a special place in my heart. So basically I'm saying that I'm gonna change the way I post, so with all that said on with the Feature Presentation.

This week is my favorite movie as a kid,I still love it to this day and still watch it from time to time. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles made my favorite cartoon real and put it up on the big screen. They have made a couple of sequels (unfortunately in one of them they go "back in time") and even a CG one with an all new story, but none of those I enjoy as much as the original. The movie with enjoyable characters April O'Neil and Casey Jones played by Judith Hoag and Elias Koteas respectfully, and I think that what tops it all off is the voice work done by Corey Feldman(Donatello). Alright enough about that, first a trailer then on with the movie.



The movie starts out with a news broadcast by April O'Neil about the recent crime wave that is hitting the big apple, as that going on you are seeing how is done. When April is done for the night as she is leaving walks into some criminals and the try to mug her. Only to have there attempt thwarted by some "unknown heroes". Enter the ninja turtles, as they are relishing in their first real fight Raph is bummed out because he lost a sai during the fight. So he decides to catch a movie.

Ugh. Where do they come up with this stuff?


Afterward he stops a purse snatching and when he goes to catch the criminals someone else is already teaching them a lesson. Casey Jones and Raph have it out a little bit and after Casey cans Raph he takes off to catch the bad guys. Raph wanting to get his sai back starts to follow April, which is a good thing because she gets jumped by the Foot Clan.

Am I behind on my Sony payments again?


After a understandable freakout by April she is told the story of their origin. When she goes home she invites the Turtles in for some pizza and on their return home Splinter is missing. The Turtles go back to April for some help only to have the Foot Clan show up there and after a big battle they burn down April's building (only after being "saved" by Casey Jones).

You guys mind telling me what you're doing to my little green pal over there, hm?


They all recoup and get their bearings at an old farm house of April's. After some training and a "visit" from Splinter they decide that they have to go back and take on the Foot Clan again. After returning Casey follows Danny (Foot member that has become friends with the Turtles and Splinter) to The Foot's hideout and they rescue Splinter.



Meanwhile the Turtles are taking on the entire Foot Clan (for some reason they fight them out of the sewers and up a building to the roof top) and eventually meet their leader Shredder.

Don't know, but I bet it never has to look for a can-opener.


Shredder is too good for the Turtles to fight and when he is about to kill Leo, Splinter shows up and that pisses off Shredder. After pulling off his mask (showing the scars that Splinter gave him) he charges him and then gets flipped over the edge of the building, to then be dropped into a waiting garbage truck.

For when you die, it will be ... Without honor.


After Casey compacts the truck and makes out with April a little bit, Splinter makes a funny. I think that this movie is still enjoyable today and for all ages even though it might not have stood the test of time. I still love the shit out of it and
I have always liked... Cowabunga.

COWABUNGA!


Next Week: The Princess Bride